Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
