i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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