my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
The beer is more important than you right now.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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