Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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