That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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