So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
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you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
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