she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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