just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
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