We're facebook friends in real life
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
