Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
