Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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