His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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