I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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