marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
