some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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