I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize