drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
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why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
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rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.