I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
