Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize