my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Randomize
