Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize