Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
