the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
My liver just had a heart attack.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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