I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
that is very illegal...i love you.
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