sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize