i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
