I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize