I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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