Plan B is the new Plan A
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
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