All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
what the fuck happened to the tacos
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize