ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
