u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
Randomize