This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
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