Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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