Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Drunk is not a location!
Randomize
