Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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