Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
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