we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize