Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Randomize
Follow @tfln