if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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