he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
