belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
