just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Randomize
