craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
