I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
