she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
