i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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