best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Randomize