I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
