I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
