I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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